A Quote in Context

So I have this refrigerator magnet that my mother gave me. Not sure when but no doubt it was part of a bigger gift. She was always a great gift giver.

But this one thing, this magnet say, “Don’t let yesterday use up too much of today.” -Native American Proverb

It’s a nice thought actually. Just that saying all by itself. But in the context of the message that’s been tossed my way each time I had some issue, some problem I wanted to discuss after it had made its way into the what she considered too far into the past to be important. And even worse is that many times it never was important to her at all.

The living too much in the past and being too sensitive was the message, even if it wasn’t said directly.

So the magnet, or rather the saying on the magnet seems just another way of sending that message.

And that’s why when I found it after unboxing some stuff I had stored away, I threw it into the living room from the dining room, and said, “That’s outta here.”

I salvaged it off the floor today long enough to write this post. Now that I’ve done that, this thing is going into the Goodwill box.

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11 thoughts on “A Quote in Context

  1. Oooooooh yes. That message is so disrespectful, devaluing, unloving, and downright hateful. My mother will prattle endlessly about slights that were done to her eons ago. But let ME mention something traumatic from my past, and “you need to live in today, that’s all water under the bridge!” What happened to me never was important to her.

    Good for you for tossing that magnet!

    Liked by 1 person

    • After I wrote this post, I tossed the magnet toward the bedroom door. And then it sat on the floor face down because I kept forgetting about it.

      Then I re-read your comment about an hour ago and remembered it.

      I asked Mr. B what he thought as well given that my mother gave it to me and he got it too. I love that he is so validating when it comes to my family. And it still amazes me how understanding he is.

      He was there during my dad’s illness and I learned through that how well aware he was about how toxic and abusive my family was.

      Anyway, the magnet is now in the Goodwill box.

      What you say about your mom being able to talk about her own slights but when you did it, the double standard kicked right in…that’s my sister.

      The more I learn about the dynamic of my family, the more I can see the narcissism of my sister. She is quite toxic. And it’s looking like she is more malignant than I first understood.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Omg i have a magnet my mother gave me that says give your troubles to god he will be up all night anyway.
    I hate little reminders of things she gave me! I love that you have a Mr. B. I have a mr. B too!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ugh, seems like a sneaky way to me now to fake having a heart about how I (we) feel. Trying to manipulate their own guilt (?)

      Between that magnet and the cards she’s sent me over the last three birthdays, it seems as though she’s trying “romance” her way (in a manipulative way) back into my life.

      Sorry, I know that sounds creepy, to use the word romance, but that’s what comes to mind when I think about those phrases and poems. Like it’s supposed to tug at my heart strings so I’ll just cave, my knees will buckle and I’ll see her as the mother she’s supposed to be without any work on her part.

      I seem to remember that quote on that magnet, coming from her didn’t sit right with me from the time she first gave it to me.

      Cheers to the Mr. Bs in the world. Glad you have support too. It makes such a difference in my life.

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      • Oh i totally agree with the wordage. To romance your way back in because it is all of these lovey words that mean nothing deep down. It’s like being played. I hate it. I’m glad you are on to her though and can see the truth.
        I don’t know what I would do with out my mr b. He knew I was fried and hurting and made me dinner and brought it to me on a tray. Now THAT is real love

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        • “It’s like being played.” !Exactly!
          That is so awesome you have someone to cook for you. I agree that is love.
          I said this on your squirrel post but I hope your leg feels better soon. 😦

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          • Thank you so much!!! I was just watching the STUPIDEST movie ever with my husband. We both hated it. The nice guys. That’s what it was called. It has been nice having him home this weekend cooking me dinner. Because my leg is very uncooperative and if i am in my chair it can’t lift my arms up high enough to do anything because the counters are too high. I have been lucky he has been home!
            But yes, just like being played!

            Liked by 1 person

            • You know I had to look The Nice Guys up right? Lol…I watched the trailer on YT and I”m embarrassed to say I laughed a little. The car crashing through the house made me jump even though I was expecting it. It made me laugh too though.

              Looked like something to watch when you don’t want anything too deep to think about.

              That sucks about the height of the wheelchair almost as much as the fact that your leg is uncooperative.

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              • The trailer had the ONLY funny scenes. Everything else was too bloody and just felt too strained, didn’t flow. And i love both the actors. We were both like EH.
                The drug a 9 year old around all of these scenarios. So she watched porn and death. Idk that just took the humor out of it for both of us really.
                I just finished watching bloodline on netflix. I liked that. I also watched rectify and that was slow but it was very moving.

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                • Oh man, that’s rather interesting how they leave the kid out of the previews. Playing dirty there. Lines are so crossed when it comes to kids in movies. That would’ve ruined it for me too.

                  I don’t know Bloodline or Rectify. I’m so out of the loop when it comes to entertainment.

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                  • And the car through the house didn’t end up being funny because there was a dead naked girl. It was laced with porn and I am not a fan of porn. That was the undertone of the entire thing. Porn and this little girl he had drive him around because he was a drunk. It was just blah.
                    I watch a lot of things on netflix and amazon because I can’t always move a lot or get out or sleep!!!!!!

                    Liked by 1 person

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